In My Life

2009-09-27T12:31:00.001-04:00

gmar chasima tova to all of my friends out in the blogosphere!

I (heart) these things...

2009-08-03T19:28:00.003-04:00

at the request of Dude with hat, i have returned briefly to post about seven things i love:

(these are in random order)

1. making people happy- for example, today at work i completed a project for a client and he called me up and told me how much he loves it and that made my day!! i love doing things for people and seeing their pleased reactions.

2. the feeling when something suddenly clicks and everything becomes crystal clear- this applies in Torah learning but also in secular studies... whenever i don't understand something and then i find another way to explain it that i really like or when someone gives me a new piece of information to complete the picture.

3. driving!

4. singing and music- i've discussed this before :-)

5. hanging out with close friends and just shmoozing and having fun

6. swimming and anything to do with water

7. fave foods, well a few of them: sushi (just had an awesome godzilla roll from Sushi Metsuyan), (israeli) iced coffee, coffee ice cream, whipped cream, and corned beef

follow-up post

2009-06-24T18:44:00.004-04:00

at a wedding last night, i saw the person i mentioned in the previous post, who i had decided to forgive and forget what she had done.

i gave her a huuuuge hug and spoke with her for a few minutes and did NOT, not even once, have any negative feelings towards her or speak negatively about her. it was such an incredible feeling!!

i hope that all of you will take this opportunity to forgive someone who hurt you at some point because its an amazing feeling to finally be done with that horrible feeling for once and for all.

:-)

forgive AND forget

2009-06-16T22:16:00.004-04:00

I recently learned about forgiveness. It's a mitzvah to forgive someone for something he/she did to you when they come to you and apologize. It's an even greater level to forgive someone when he/she did not even come to you to ask for forgiveness.

I left the shiur with a mission: to forgive someone I've held a grudge against for nearly four years. Even though I thought I had forgiven her for what she did and how she acted towards me, I did not forget. And in Yiddishkeit, it's not ok to just forgive but one needs to forget also. Because if you still remember, then it means you still hold a grudge. So I decided to honestly and completely and wholeheartedly forgive and forget the incident. Because I can truly see how though this person may have wronged me, she actually did me the biggest favor because I ended up where I did and it was all yad Hashem- truly. (though i did not realize that at the time, of course)

I feel like a burden is now lifted off my heart.

And I know that when I see her next week (and I know I will for sure), that I can go over to her and hug her and honestly ask how she's doing, and forget the past, because the future is so much more important.

When i think of her now, all i can do is smile. It's a funny thing, mechila (forgiveness). Totally changes everything upside and right side up.

2009-05-22T17:35:00.001-04:00

hey guys!

just wanted to check in and say hi! hope y'all have a great shabbos!

news flash

2009-04-13T11:19:00.003-04:00

i will be taking a hiatus from this blog for a while. feel free to go through the archives and comment, comment, comment!

enjoy the rest of pesach!

(i'll still be checking other blogs and commenting, so i won't be totally gone :)

2009-04-07T23:31:00.002-04:00

Well, almost all cooking has been finished and we're all heading to bed, B"H. Just want to wish everyone a Chag Kasher V'Sameach! Enjoy it!!!!

Can't wait for Bircas HaChama very early tomorrow morning :)

TAoPP part 2

2009-04-07T00:11:00.004-04:00

for all those who had trouble figuring that out (lol)... this is The Adventures of Pesach Prep continued!

In keeping with the funny/weird theme: I took my brother shoe shopping for Yom Tov. He (finally) found a shoe he liked and it was on the clearance rack. My bro tried it on and it fit ok so we asked the salesguy, Sean, to bring out the other shoe. Sean returned a few minutes later and said sadly, "I can't find the other shoe. I think it was thrown out." (!!!) I've never heard of Macy's throwing out new shoes before! Have you?

Also, I think I now appreciate men's shoes a little more. I used to think they're all the same, unlike women's shoes. But after shopping tonite, i think i'm getting the hang of it! there's tons of variety- loafers, tie-ups, tassels, cowboy shoes, with a heel, with rubber sole, in black, maroon, tan, pointed toe, square toe, square-ish toe, round toe, up toe, down toe, with design, without design, one color, two-tone, the list is endless.

so now, all you girls out there who until now thought guys' shoes are all the same, i hope you'll reconsider. i have :)

The Adventures of Pesach Preparation

2009-04-05T14:22:00.006-04:00

If i were writing a novel called The Adventures of Pesach Preparation, this would definitely go in it: While my brother was vacuuming the car, his yarmulka fell off and was sucked into the vacuum! He had to go buy another one! How funny is that?? :-p

to be continued :)

Here's a great inspirational song to listen to while you're preparin g...

M.O.

2009-04-03T16:07:00.004-04:00

You know, some people would be envious of Michelle Obama. I mean, she is First Lady of the U.S. But I really don't envy her at all. There's a lot of stress and expectations. People expect many things from her. She can't make any mistakes because she represents the President. And when she's outside of the U.S., it's even worse. Because she represents America.

I'm not into politics at all (and that may be a whole 'nother discussion why not) but I am into fashion. The President and First Lady were in Europe this week, spending some time in England. Out of all things to talk about, the press focuses on Michelle meeting the Queen, her etiquette, and her clothing!

There's one sweater that got a lot of criticism. (Quoted from Time Magazine:) "Then Thursday morning she was off to the Royal Opera, dressed in a sequined, patchwork cardigan, the kind of goofy outfit that in another context could get a teenage daughter eye rolls from her baffled parents."

I actually like the sweater. I think it's really cool and original. When I first saw it in the pictures, I thought, hey, i'd like to get myself one of those! Only problem: it costs $800!!

(and notice that it only comes in small and medium... let's say you're a size large, G-d forbid?)

What do you think?

Design

2009-04-01T21:08:00.002-04:00

Poll: Do you like the design of my blog?

Results: 4 users said yes, 3 users said no

For all those who said no, would you mind telling me what it is that you don't like so i can fix it?

And for all you yes-ers, please tell me what you do like about my blog.

Thanks!

2009-03-31T22:30:00.005-04:00

I passed by this sign today while driving in Queens. Pretty scary, no?

Picture Perfect (i wish...)

2009-03-29T10:07:00.009-04:00

i had an argument with my mother today. her friend, who thought of a boy for me, dislikes the photo on my shidduch "resume" and wants a different one. i really am not so photogenic so i dont have any good pictures i would want to give this shadchan, other than the one that's on my resume now which is from my brother's bar mitzvah. so this shadchan decided she doesnt like that picture and wants another one. i dont have another one! i like that one! but my mother wants me to find a different one... and she wants my yearbook picture.

okay, first of all, my yearbook picture is from THREE years ago. second, i hate it!! i really really really don't like it and i would never want any guy who is deciding whether or not to date me (or worse, his mother) to see that.

i decided to google "shidduch picture" to see what others in the blogosphere had to say on the topic and i arrived at this site, which said:

"12/23/2003

Ed. Note - Possibly of interest for those who'd like to lightly touch up" their shidduch photo.

HATE YOUR YEARBOOK PICTURE? Attention students and teachers: get rid of unsightly pimples, remove orthodontic braces, circles under eyes, double chins, stray hairs, etc. I will retouch your yearbook or other photo for only $10!"

The last line of the ad was the best... it says: "Remember Hashem made you perfect, but the camera makes mistakes!" awwwww... how sweet! lol

in the end, however, i caved, and sent the yearbook picture. because i figure the shadchan will compare the two pictures and come to the conclusion that the first picture is much better (which is exactly the conclusion i want her to come to!!)

PS. i had always heard a rumor that the guys in lakewood had a library filled with all high school yearbooks from all the schools all over the US from all the years. but a guy i went out with recently claims he has never seen a yearbook in Lakewood yeshiva. THANK G-D!! (all you girls can breathe a sigh of relief)

Blogging about Life

2009-03-26T15:00:00.005-04:00

Child Ish Behavior, on SomethingDifferent's post about Blogging Inspiration, linked to a little quiz to figure out what type of blogger you are. I took the quiz and it revealed what type of blogger I am....

Let me know what you think... Is it true?

You want my... honey??

2009-03-25T19:27:00.002-04:00

no, silly! they wanted my blood!

recently i donated blood for the first time! the first time i willingly gave blood was in high school when i was tested for Dor Yesharim. when i heard there was going to be a blood drive i was kinda nervous about donating. im not squeamish with blood but the thought of someone sticking me with a needle and taking a pint (!) of blood out of me really made me nervous. in the end, thanks to (the good kind of) peer pressure, i decided to give blood.

B"H i was totally fine, though i actually saw my friend faint in front of my eyes! (but that's a different story) it took about fifteen minutes, maybe less, and then it was all over. and i feel so great about giving the gift of life! you know, they say 60% of people in my region are eligible to give blood and only 2% do. every 2 seconds someone else in the world needs blood. it's a major thing to be able to give. so if you're eligible... do it! you'll feel so great afterwards (okay... maybe two hours later, after the weakness and lightheadedness has gone away :)

one of the girls i was with said something really amazing that got me thinking. she said that we're at an age now where we will do something to willingly hurt ourselves because we know something good will come out of it. think about it...

when i was younger like 10 years old, no way would i allow myself to get hurt if i had the choice. why have to suffer willingly? but now, as a 20-year-old, i understand that it may hurt for a second or maybe for 15 minutes will im being pinched with a needle stuck in my vein drawing out my blood, but afterwards i'll be ok and i'll be able to save someone's life.

it's a really amazing idea if you think about it. the more i think about the concept of taking my blood to give to someone else, the more amazing i realize it is. my blood going into someone else's body is pretty cool. and the whole thing about different blood types is cool too. i can't wait to find out what type i am! lol

fyi here are some facts about giving blood:

1. one pint of blood can save up to three lives

2. the average adult body contains 10 pints of blood

3. 500,000 Americans donated blood in the days following September 11th, 2001

4. A newborn baby has about one cup of blood in his body

5. there is no substitute for human blood.

JUST DO IT!

Dance Evolution

2009-03-23T23:13:00.008-04:00

Every once in a while i'll find a song that i absolutely love and get obsessed with. i listen to it a million trillion times until i get sick of it and then move on to the next song. the song im obsessed with now (and listening to now :) is Michoel Pruzansky's "Al Tirah" which i got off the Oorah Shmorg CD that they sent out in the mail. it's one of those songs that just puts me in a good mood and makes we want to dance.

** LISTEN TO 'Al Tirah' HERE **

the last song i can think of that i was obsessed with and made me want to dance was on Shalsheles 4: "Ashira". I put on that song blasting and just danced the night away, listening for hours on end to the same song on repeat! it was a blast! though my sisters thought i was crazy!! but i got them to dance with me.
im not really a dancer. at weddings i'll dance of course but im not one of those girls who knows all the complicated dance steps. i know a few basic dances and i don't really have to any more than that because usually we use just the simple ones. i know the 6 step tho!! im so proud of myself. though i'd prob be too embarrassed to do it in front of everyone, for fear that i'd mess up lol.
when i was younger, in like 4th grade, i took dance class after school. i was one of the best in my class, really, and im not saying to brag or anything. i was really good but then i just lost it. must of been with all that growing and maturing, i just lost that talent. it's something i wish i could do. like ice skating. i've always wanted to figure skate! they look so graceful and beautiful out there with all the triple lutzes and double axels and spins. that's always my favorite sport to watch in the olympics.
so i guess i could learn to dance again. tho im content with just dancing in my room to my (now) favorite songs, although who knows how long it'll be b4 im sick of them!!!

here are some of my favorite songs for your listening pleasure... ENJOY!
Meidad Tasa's "Al Naharot Bavel"
David Ross's "Power to Be" (the Voices for Israel version is much better)
Baruch Levine's "Vezakaini"
and a lot of others that i can't think of right now!!

just as i was publishing this post, my friend sent me this link to such a cute video! check it out HERE. i wish i was on that flight!!! and please post comments... i, too, belong to the "I love comments club" :-p

rules are meant to be broken

2009-03-17T15:36:00.004-04:00

rules are meant to be broken.

or are they?

who made up all these rules about shidduchim? things like, waiting upstairs when the guy comes in to meet your parents, him opening the car door for you, who leaves the house first... all these things. who made them up? must have been someone. these things have become so accepted that if someone breaks the rules, it's like they've done something wrong, when in reality they haven't... they've just done something different.

and these days people are so against people being different.

but what i think is interesting is that i've gotten questions from shadchanim or people who have called me about my friends for a shidduch, like: what makes you different from all the other girls out there? what makes so-and-so different?

so what's going on here? is different good or bad?

TGIF

2009-03-13T09:40:00.006-04:00

TGIF, right?

I absolutely love fridays. it's not just because it's the end of the week and i'm off, with no school or work. it's because of all the preparations for shabbos and in anticipation of the weekend, which begins today.

i used to get up late on fridays because i didnt have to get up for school or work but then i realized it's so much nicer to wake up early and be available to help out my mom and do some preparations for shabbos. it gives me a sense of accomplishment.. like, look what I made! wow, i did that!

i think that is something i really enjoy- being able to accomplish something and look back at it, even years later, and be like, "wow! i really did something" or "i really made a difference" or "look what i went through and who/what i became." i think everyone gets that satisfaction from accomplishing something. especially if it took real effort on their part.

i'm really excited for this shabbos! i've been tired all week. i haven't had a chance to catch up on my sleep because of purim and everything and it's been a busy couple of weeks. so i'm hoping i'll get a chance to get some zzzzzzs and enjoy the company that we're having :) it's gonna be fun!

now on a completely different subject:

i got a reference call for a shidduch for a friend of mine. this woman who called me knew no information about my friend, except her name (and i guess her references, cuz she had my number). so i told her to ask me questions (because that's the only way i'll talk about a girl... i hate it when people say, "so tell me about so-and-so..." and i'm like "um..... can you please ask me some specific questions?!") so what im really wondering is how did this woman get my friend's name and references. i mean, if she had the references then she probably would have her shidduch resume also and then all the other basic info would be on there too. except maybe she got the numbers from someone else, and why wouldn't that person share the resume with her?? anybody got a clue?

Purim

2009-03-10T23:18:00.002-04:00

B"H i had THE best Purim EVER!

I think it was so great because it was really inspirational and spiritual but also really fun. I went to a Tehillim group at chatzos on Purim night, davened vasikin this morning, heard megillah, gave out mishloach manos (at home, to my friends, etc), prepared for seudah and had seudah with family and friends. it was amazing! i hope you all had as great a Purim as i did!!

2009-03-08T13:15:00.003-04:00

Just want to wish everyone a Freilichen Purim and I hope you all enjoy the fun! It's a little busy around here but IY"H after Purim I'll be back...

2009-03-03T17:25:00.004-05:00

ok i gotta admit, im a real girl! i saw this quote on a classmate's looseleaf in high school, and i've never forgotten it since. it's so 'me.'

Dreams

2009-03-02T23:59:00.009-05:00

a year ago, in an art class, i learned something unbelievable: some people dream in black and white. i was shocked! i had always thought that all people dream in color. my teacher polled the class and we discovered that one student (my friend!!) dreams in monochrome. she couldn't imagine dreaming in color. i myself dream in color; all dreams are exactly like real life, except, of course, they're dreams.

so i decided to do some research, as this is a topic truly fascinating to me, and this is what i discovered:

- Psychology researchers have discovered that if you grew up on black and white TV you are more likely to dream in monochrome than people who have watched color TV all their lives.

- A psychology student did a survey of 60 people, half over 55 and half under 25. Only 4.4% of the under-25s dreamed in monochrome.

- Even more fascinating, before black and white TV, research has shown that people dreamed in color!

- According to research, most people dream in both color AND monochrome, but some only dream in monochrome.

Do you dream in color? Or just black and white? Do you also find this fascinating? Share your thoughts, opinions, comments, etc.

ps. if you don't know whether you dream in color or not, sleep on it, and try to remember in the morning!!

surprise me!

2009-02-28T23:24:00.004-05:00

what is it about surprises? some people love 'em and some people hate 'em.

a few friends and i surprised a friend today. it's almost her birthday and we decided to make her a party. so we planned something with her mother and we went over to her house at the planned time. guess what- she was sleeping!!! her sister went down to wake her up and she didnt want to get up! so we had to do what all good friends would do... wake her up! we went downstairs and came into her room singing HAPPY BIRTHDAY! boy, was she surprised! and she was like laughing and rubbing her eyes and totally not expecting it! it was so cute. but she wasnt upset at us for waking her up cuz it was worth it.

it was really nice just to shmooze (and eat and eat and eat)

reminds me of the surprise party we made for parents last year. their anniversary is in the summer so me and my siblings planned a surprise party for them on shabbos, cuz their anniversary came out on shabbos. i baked a lot and bought a lot of fruit. my mother didnt suspect anything. we invited a bunch of their friends and neighbors and set up dessert on our deck in the backyard. my parents had no clue! my brother sat on the front porch to tell all the guests to go around back. when it was time for dessert and all the guests were there, we told my parents to go out back, and then everyone yelled "surprise!" it was so nice cuz they were soooo surprised.. they had no idea we were planning anything! it was fun! here's a pic of the cake i made:

so any ideas on the whole psychology behind surprises?

Ash on your face... a big disgrace

2009-02-26T23:08:00.002-05:00

Yesterday was Ash Wednesday.

I was walking in NYC, getting myself a coffee, when i noticed many people with black stuff on their foreheads. Had i not been in the subway last year on ash wednesday and noticed it and found out about it, then i would not have known. but i knew it was because of a christian holiday.

i just googled 'ash wednesday' and found out that christians put a cross made from ash on their foreheads as a sign of repentence, as it is the beginning of Lent, 40 days before easter. now, you may ask why am i telling you all this nonsense? it is because, as a teacher once to me, the christians and muslims have taken everything from the jews. in class we were discussing yerushalayim and what we do nowadays to remember yerushalayim.

1. if one builds a new house, leave a square part of wall unfinished

2. under chupah chosson breaks glass

3. some have the custom also under the chupa or before the chupah to put ash on the forehead of the chosson (and then to wipe it off) as a sign of aveilus for yerushalayim (just like on tisha b'av we eat the egg and ashes, etc). the christians' custom of ash wednesday actually comes from our remembrance of yerushalayim! along with all the other things they stole from us and use in their own distorted ways.

i just thought that was interesting. what was also interesting was seeing all these people with black smudgy stuff on their foreheads. i bet they are all self-conscious about it and wipe it off as soon as they can :)

Advice

2009-02-25T19:45:00.002-05:00

First, i would like to express my thanks to frum college girl for turning me on to blogging. i found her blog, started reading, and haven't stopped... and started my own blog- all thanks to her! so thank you fcg!

Second, my blog started with my first post, rightfully named "First Post". i needed advice about my dating situation so i decided to turn to readers in the blogosphere to get some help. though i received little help and a lot of criticism (it's okay- im totally over it!!), i would like to ask advice on a present situation...

today i was talking to someone i work with. she works from home so i only get to see her on rare occasions when she comes into the office. i was talking to her today via IM and this is how the conversation went:

tembow: hi!

her: hi!!! how are you?

tembow: tired but otherwise great! u?

her: great!

tembow: that's good

btw when are you due?

her: ask A (another girl i work with) that question. she'll answer you

tembow: why?

her: she'll know

tembow: ok

gnite

her: gnite!!!

ok so i knew something was up! but then i got an email when i got home from work, from A.- the other girl i work with. this is what her email said:

hey tembow...

i meant to tell you but i think you were away when it happened.

but B. is no longer pregnant... she had a miscarriage :(

it's really sad because she was like 5 months along and it was a major deal... she was out for 2 weeks (pretty much the whole time you were away)

i feel really bad that i never mentioned it to you... and i hope that i didn't put you in any type of uncomfortable position.

B. just asked me to tell you because she has trouble talking about it...

I FEEL SOOOO BAD! i had no clue and i just "randomly" asked her, i don't know why. it happened while i was in israel so i guess nobody thought to tell me or forgot.

do you think i should apologize or just pretend that it never happened??

A Wedding Story

2009-02-24T23:25:00.004-05:00

B"H this week i've been to a fair share of weddings (and it's only Tuesday!) they've all been really nice and really different. now i can't really go into details but i want to discuss a few things:

1- why do people standing in the back at chupas feel the need to talk? come on- it's half an hour of your time! just be quiet! i think it totally disrupts the aura and atmosphere of the chupa when you have tons of people talking. it's almost like they think no one can hear them :)

2- the real reason why people should go to weddings is for the mitzvah of being mesame'ach chassan v'kallah, not for "showing yourself off" to prospective mothers-in-law or for catching up with old friends. you're really supposed to go for the kallah (in a girl's case). usually i don't really feel like im fulfilling this mitzvah cuz there are tons of people there and i dance with the kallah for maybe 20 seconds. but on a rare occasion, such as a wedding i attended recently, i truly felt like i was really fulfilling the mitzvah. every person counted, each girl who came. and it was amazing to see everyone come for that reason!

3- ever been "snobbed out"? (when i told a friend what happened to me she hadn't heard this term used before.. did i make it up??) at a wedding, i went over to a friend i hadn't seen in a month or two and said hello and she totally ignored and barely looked in my direction. and i know she heard me because i sat down NEXT to her! i was totally insulted and didn't talk to her the rest of the night, and of course she didn't say anything to me. now i know im supposed to be dan l'kaf zechus, but in this case it's too hard :(

4- i don't need to even mention this because it's such a cliche already but i'll just say.... black black black black -with little exception (v'hamayvin yavin :)

all in all, beautiful weddings and nice to see friends and get my exercise of the day dancing the night away!

You gotta check this out! it's brilliant

2009-02-24T14:28:00.003-05:00

i've been meaning to put up a new post but until i actually get it up, here' s a pic to keep you entertained!!

We've got guests!

2009-02-18T20:20:00.004-05:00

Reading NMF#7's Israel Chronicles got me thinking a little...

I really look up to my parents a lot! they're such amazing people B"H and some things they do are just amazing.

I came home from work today and there was this single woman from israel, probably in her 30s, eating supper at my kitchen table. i had NO CLUE who she was and asked my mother a little later who she is. my mother told me that she's just someone who needed a place to stay for a few days or a few weeks or a few months and she's going to be staying with us!

now my first reaction (not out loud) was: what? this woman is staying with us? why us? we don't know her.. for how long? etc etc. But after thinking about it for a little bit i've realized that this is not the first time this has happened and it won't be the last i'yH and this is a really great opportunity of chessed and hachnosas orchim! we've had a lot of different types of people stay by us over the years. whether it be foster children, or a spanish giyores for Pesach, or two kids in need of a home for winter vacation, my parents have opened up their/our home for them! and its something i really look up to them for, because i don't know if i could do that time and time again like they have. it really is something i would love to be able to say in one second when offered: "yeah! i would love to have you stay here!" with enthusiasm and love. but i don't think im at that stage yet. tho it's something im striving for... to open to all diff types of people, all the time. iy"H one day i''ll get there.

but right now im really looking forward to getting to know our new guest and seeing what i can learn from the experience.

diet motivation

2009-02-16T23:26:00.002-05:00

my friend came up with the idea that we should have a competition, sort of like Biggest Loser, to see who can lose the most weight.

we set the rules as such: we have until pesach (about 5 weeks) to lose the pounds to get to our goal weights. whoever loses, has to take the other person out to dinner. [i know... eating after losing the weight... lol... but that's what we decided] each sunday morning we have to weigh ourselves and call the other person and tell them what we're up to.

i would like to lose ten pounds and she'd also like to lose ten pounds (except her weight is from having her baby and mine is just FAAAAAAAAAAAT :(

problem is... MOTIVATION

hopefully this contest will get me motivated enough to stick with it. im very competitive by nature so i hope this will work

so far today was great! i was really good and watched what i ate :) but it is only DAY #1 lol

we'll take it day by day

do i have any supporters out there in the blogosphere??

lazy sunday? nah

2009-02-16T00:37:00.002-05:00

you know those mornings when you wake up and you think you have nothing planned, and then everything just falls into place and you have a jam-packed day?? well, that was my day! and it was great! like i've said before, i love busy sundays!! today was one such day...

between going out with a "little sister", going to the mall with a friend and her adorable baby, going to the AJOP convention and listening to some speakers, today was one crazy, amazing day (it's really cool how those two adjectives go so well together lol :)

hope you all had such a great day as i had! and like one of the speakers tonite said, "may you all have A LOT of worries!" (if you're a little confused at that- and you have the right to be- check out the AJOP convention speeches from tonite which will be on torahanytime.com sometime soon)

wake up and smell the coffee :)

2009-02-12T20:22:00.003-05:00

I had an interesting experience today...

A girl in my class at school has

never

had a

cup

coffee

before

in her

life!!

So me and another girl decided to take her to Starbucks (my favorite!!)

She was nervous- she's so cute- and when she took the first sip it took her time to get used to it. after a few sips, she liked it a little more but it was too much of a coffee taste for her and she couldn't drink the whole thing. and she said she felt tipsy from the caffeine (she never drinks soda either- can you imagine??) but it was a fun experience.

i've read some things people have written on their blogs about coffee, like how some people just don't like it but i had never heard of someone who hadn't ever tried it! that's new to me, as i've been drinking coffee ever since my father let me have some of his, when i was younger (and yet, i still grew!! despite all my mother said about coffee stunting my growth :)

im a big coffee person, not because im addicted or anything. im not. i don't get withdrawal on fast days B"H. i love the taste and the caffeine is good too. but i drink decaf too. the caffeine doesn't really affect me that much. if i drink a lot, then yeah, it does. but not a regular size cup of coffee. my favorite starbucks drink is a "tall skinny vanilla latte with whipped cream"!! YUMMY!

Do you like coffee? Does it make you do anything crazy- shake, get hyper, high??

oh, and check out the new poll on the right!

2009-02-11T23:38:00.002-05:00

would you go out with someone who has had a broken engagement? why or why not?

I hate vorts!

2009-02-10T20:41:00.002-05:00

I absolutely, positively, unequivocally dislike vorts (engagement parties)!

You get all dressed up to go to the kallah's house or a hall where you stand and shmooze with random people for all of half an hour (tops) and then go home. I always feel like i should go out afterwards because im all dressed up anyway :) Vorts are just uncomfortable because you can have these two-minute conversations with people you never see (and won't see until the next vort or wedding) that consist of something like this: (here's the one-sided version)

"Hi, how are you?"

"Good, Baruch Hashem"

"So what are you up to now?"

"Do you like it?"

"Oh, that's great."

"Uh huh"

"Good luck!"

"See you at more simchas! Iy"H by you!!"

These conversations are sooooo stupid! Most of the time you're not even listening to the other person's answers because their response is so predictable.

Then you go over to the kallah to say mazel tov. She gives you a kiss, says "thank you" to the mazel tov, says "thank you" to the "you look so pretty," and maybe points out her chosson. (If you're close to the kallah then this doesn't really happen. what does happen is some screaming and hugging and "I can't believe it"s from both of you.)

Before you leave you survey the room to see if there's anyone else you should say hi to, and then leave.

It's always best to go to a vort with someone, in my case, I like to go with a friend who wants to get out of there as fast as i do. if i go with my mother she'll introduce me to everyone she knows (usually a lot of people!) and ask them if they know any boys for me, while i stand there and smile (uch!)

i'd much rather go out on a date!

2009-02-09T20:58:00.003-05:00

Just a little more Tu B'Shvat inspiration...

I went to a shiur tonite and my teacher said something very interesting. she said that the four seasons correspond to different parts of the day:

fall=evening

winter=night

spring=dawn

summer=midday

Tu B'Shvat is at about 3:00 in the morning- neither day nor night.

My situation now (like many other bloggers and friends) is like Tu B'shvat- it's between childhood and adulthood. The lesson we should take from this is to be like the trees.. to wake up parts of us that are dormant. It's a good time to change! It's a good time to work on things.

Also another thing she said in the shiur is that this week's parsha is parshas yisro. A medrash says that the mann fell down from the sky together with jewels. The simple people only collected the mann to eat. The gedolim (great people) collected only the jewels. You would think it would be the opposite. What do the gedolim need the jewels for in the desert? Food is so much more important!? But the answer is that the gedolim weren't thinking about the "today." They were thinking how one day there would be a mishkan (tabernacle) and the jewels would be needed for that. The simple people only thought about what they needed at that very moment. Great people or leaders detect what is needed for the future - "haRoeh es haNolad" - see the future. They think about what will be needed; not necessary what is needed now.

Tu B'Shvat Higiah

2009-02-08T20:56:00.002-05:00

(remember the song... tu b'shvat higiah, chag la'ilanot...)

i got an email this morning from a NMF living in israel who told me how she was planning to have a tu b'shvat seder tonite with her husband and some friends. they were going to have 15 different fruits for the 15 shir hama'alos perakim of tehillim. i thought- such a nice idea. [the past few years, i've been in israel for tu b'shvat: last year i was at a chassidish tish where all the chassidim danced and sang as the new fruits were eaten by the rebbe. that was so nice! the year before last year, i went for shabbos (in sem) to a kiruv place where they were having a friday night dinner and tu b'shvat seder. that was so cool and enlightening because the people there were not-yet-religious and were asking me and my friend all kinds of questions about Judaism, etc.] so i decided where else to look for information about how to do a tu b'shvat seder than on the internet? so i put it into ask.com and arrived at this page.

i set up the table and everything and everyone in my family sat down to a tu b'shvat seder. it was really nice and really meaningful. (here's a pic)

you still have time.... until tomorrow night! so go for it!! :)

2009-02-05T21:45:00.004-05:00

i don't know if you've heard or haven't heard about the passing of HaRav Noach Weinberg, ZATZAL, founder and Rosh Yeshiva of Aish HaTorah. I couldn't not post anything.

Rav Weinberg, there are so many people who owe everything to you because you returned them to their Jewish roots. You cared so much for every single Jew; you had such ahavas yisrael. Aish HaTorah will not be the same without you.

I have so much I owe to Rav Weinberg. Some reasons are personal but one I will share is that last winter when i went to Israel with some friends, i was privileged to take some classes in Aish Essentials in the Old City. It was an amazing experience. I was there with a few Bais Yaakov girls and there were not-yet-religious students there as well. I learned a lot and it was so interesting to hear what these students asked and thought about various topics.

i was stunned to hear of the passing of Rav Weinberg today. he will really be missed. may he be a meilitz yosher for all of klal yisrael.

finally!

2009-02-05T21:29:00.005-05:00

for the past few months my cell phone has been sick. it'll just shut off randomly or i'll get a message that comes up that says "insert SIM card" when i haven't taken it out at all. for months i've been saying i need to get a new phone. but the problem is... im in love with my cell phone! seriously, i resist change. almost all change. even good things like a new cell phone are hard. it takes me a while to get used to things but in the end i get used to it (so i just need to remember that i'll get used to it every time i need to change something or someone else changes something).

so anyway, finally i decided tonite is the night im going to the phone store. so i went. and i found a cool phone i like that's FREE!! so i decided to get it (and it's a cool green but that's besides the point :)

i was talking to the guy at the counter who was helping me and i told him how im so attached to my phone and i would totally keep it if only it wasn't broken. he didn't really understand that because here i am getting a new cool phone and i want my old flip phone back. but i told him i love it cuz i can text without looking cuz i know the keys so well, etc etc. im just comfortable with it. at the end, when he was giving me my new phone and the box with the charger in it, he hands me back my old phone and says, "in case you have separation anxiety." i laughed cuz it was so funny and true. but no, i will not go back to my old broken phone, though i do love it, because i've got this super cool phone to play around with now, and get used to. that'll take some time, but don't fear- just give me a week and i'll be over with the old one and completely in love with the new one! lol

my new phone is a Samsung Propel (you can check it out online). its got a full keyboard and it slides up- really cool! and i love the color (it's wayyyyy better than old boring black- besides, if im always wearing black it'll be a cool accessory, better than a color clutch :)

im not a maniac text-er like that girl in the news who sent 14,000 texts in a month and set a record! i text pretty often, but not crazy. so it'll be interesting to text with a full keyboard instead of the nine keys at T9, if you know what i mean.

just wanted to share the good news cuz im excited! though i lost some of my ringtones... :(

help wanted (needed?)

2009-02-02T20:22:00.002-05:00

i need some help! i have a bunch of textbooks from college that i need to get rid of because im never going to use them again and they're just taking up space when they could be getting me money!!

i decided to do a search for the best online textbook buy-back site. so i conducted an experiment. i took the ISBN of one book i want to sell and i plugged it into a few web sites to see which site would give me the most money for my book. the results were that bookbyte.com would give me the most $ back for my book, but after doing some google searches for "bookbyte reviews" i decided that i should not use them. a teacher suggested using facultybooks.com, but they don't pay that well. i could use amazon to sell back my books but they only pay you when you have a buyer and that could be tomorrow or, well... never.

so im back to square one, with all my books still sitting on my shelf and no idea what to do with them. so if you've got any ideas for me, im up for anything at this point!

one track minded

2009-01-29T22:52:00.005-05:00

i got an interesting text the other day from a friend. it was rosh chodesh shvat. this is what it said:

Happy rosh chodesh :) two weeks and chag labachurot

so i texted her back "what?? i have no clue what you're talking about!"

she texted me back "the freezer opens on tu bshvat. it's not a chag la'ilanot but for bachurot to get dates!"

OMG i was laughing so hard!! it was so funny...

checking my email later that day i found an email from another friend which said this:

"a few more weeks and they'll be free!" and then had this pic. how funny?

now i know some people will have a heyday with this post and come out and say how it's crazy how the boys are in the freezer... shidduch crisis... stupid thing, etc etc etc. but that's how it is so let's just "deal" with it LOL

i (personally) cannot wait! :p

This one's for you SD!

2009-01-28T21:02:00.002-05:00

In response to SomethingDifferent's meme and request that i do it too...

Here's how it works: You type "[your first name] needs" into Google. Copy and paste the words into your blog. (click here to check out SD's meme)

1. Tembow needs your help. (I do?)

2. Tembow needs a new hair stylist. (What i really need is to get my hair done; i've got the stylist)

3. Tembow needs a computer router. (Okay, this is a weird one.)

4. Tembow needs a family that will be patient, consistent, kind and loving. (Baruch Hashem, I have one already that is all that and more!)

5. Tembow needs to chill. (I think i chill way too much instead of doing all the stuff i need to do. sometimes i can really be a procrastinator- especially when it comes to exercising!!)

6. Tembow needs a makeover. (i'd love a FREE one!!)

7. Tembow needs to eat. (haha :) this one is definitely NOT for me)

8. Tembow needs and wants a date! (true, true. i am single right now lol anybody know any guys??)

9. Tembow needs to stop being so grouchy! (lol lol lol)

10. Tembow needs advice. (Thank G-d for all of you guys! that's what you're here for!!!!)

thanks SD! this was cute

My husband doesn't like that.

2009-01-26T23:10:00.002-05:00

i went out yesterday with a married friend. we went shopping at the mall and over the course of our conversations, in and out of the many stores, she said at least 3 times "i can't wear that. my husband said i shouldn't." we saw cute open toe shoes in one store and she said her husband doesn't like the way open toe shoes look with tights. her husband doesn't like it when she wears wedges either. he doesn't think it's tzniyusdik. my question is: is it supposed to be like that- where she can't wear what she may like because her husband says no or because he doesn't like it. where's the balance? i know of course if you love somebody then you care about their opinion and you wear things that they like to see you in but really... let's say i really like belts and my husband doesn't. does that mean i can't or shouldn't wear them anymore?

finish the sentences...

2009-01-25T22:08:00.009-05:00

OK, here's a cute meme i found on somebody's blog. basically just finish the following 8 sentences:

1. I wish I could...

2. My biggest fear is...

3. I hate to...

4. I love...

5. Today I will...

6. Yesterday I...

7. My hair is...

8. I will never...

* I tag: Something Different, Frum College Girl, Harry-er than them all, NMF #7, Bad4Shidduchim, TooYoung2Teach, and The Jewish Side of Babysitter.

Here's mine all filled out:

1. I wish I could be one of those people who is never bored and always doing something useful with his/her time. I received an email from Aish today that said: "Rabbi Eliezer said... Do Teshuvah one day before your death. (Pirkei Avos)" Rabbi Eliezer's disciples asked him, "How can we know on what day we will die?" He answered, "That is precisely the point. Since we do not know on what day we will die, we should live every day as if it were our last." (Shabbos 153a) I know this sounds morbid, but it puts everything into perspective.

2. My biggest fear is to lose someone I love and not get to say goodbye.

3. I hate to speak publicly. though im okay in a small group or 1-on-1 but i hate public speaking! someone once analyzed my handwriting and told me that i would be good at it, though. go figure!

4. I love that feeling of closeless to Hashem, standing at the Kotel, and being able to speak to Him freely and be completely there in my thoughts.

5. Today (it's so late now so i'll do it for tomorrow) I will try to view everything that happens with a positive attitude.

6. Yesterday I enjoyed my last day of vacation (for a while).

7. My hair needs help!

8. I will never forget the first time i drove by myself after getting my license :)

*Thanks to all those who did this meme! Hope you enjoyed... tho im anxious to see the results of Jewish Side's poll LOL :)

It's all in the details :)

2009-01-24T19:41:00.004-05:00

well i just want to start off by saying that im so glad i did decide to go to israel because it was the best trip ever! i feel like i needed it to "recharge" my batteries and to give myself an uplift in ruchniyus. in america everyone is so into the gashmiyus and then you go to israel and you see people living in tiny apartments and focusing on learning torah and doing mitzvos and living on the minimum. it makes you realize what's really important. though, of course we still went out to eat and bought presents while we were there, but it's just a good reminder of what's important in life. like i feel like now i could really live in israel (for a little bit) when i get married IY"H.

but newayz now for the details... :)

ten days is soooo short! i could have stayed for much longer, and i have stayed longer in the past, but this was what i could do for now and i start school on monday so i had to come back. i was totally not bored at all; we had so much to do. i visited my sister in sem, went to the kotel a lot, got brachos from rabanim/rebbetzins, visited relatives and friends, went out to eat, did some touring and A LOT OF DAVENING! it really was a very spiritual vacation. and it helps that i went with a friend who is sooo growth-oriented and really made sure we did a lot of ruchniyus-dikke things. it was truly amazing!! it was so gr8 to be back and to see teachers from seminary and visit the girls now in sem and see relatives and friends i haven't seen in a year. i came back on a high. it was great! it's good to be home but i wish i was back in israel, for real!

the last day i was in israel i went to a teacher from sem for lunch at his home. it was him, his wife, his daughter, me and my sister. it was really nice. we started talking about some things in hashkafa. i mentioned that i find some things to be so much easier for me in eretz yisrael than in america. he said something interesting- that in america, the boundaries are so much clearer. this is assur and this is mutar. that is for the goyim and this for jews. but in israel, because it's israel, people see things on the street going on and its less clear (for us simple jews) whats mutar and assur. it's easy to assume that everything in israel is holy and ruchniyus. but that's definitely NOT the case. and it gets worse and worse each year. what goes on in "town" and some areas is disgusting! really. i saw things with my own eyes. its gross. but on the other hand there's tons of kedusha. it's "zeh l'umas zeh"- the more kedusha there is, the more tumah there is as well. it's really unfortunate but it's reality.

one more thing that was a wake-up for me... i was reminded by a great person while i was there how important it is to be "metzapeh l'yeshuah", to wait for and look forward to Moshiach's arrival every day. when a person goes to shamayim after 120 he will be asked a series of questions, one of which will be: "Did you anticipate Moshiach every day?" it's so important. we in chutz l'aretz don't always remember it. but for some people, it's something they think about every day. and it's so important. i want to try to remember that everyday. of course i say ani maamin during davening, but do i really look forward to moshiach? everyday? do i really want the geulah?? do you?

Im Back!

2009-01-23T14:11:00.002-05:00

hey guys- im back from israel! B"H i had the most amazing trip ever!

im so glad i went in the end... i was not bored in yerushalayim and i even went up north!!

more details coming later...

just wanted to stop in and say hi and wish everyone a great shabbos!

ttys

So long, Farewell!

2009-01-11T20:42:00.002-05:00

hey! its been a while since i last posted! quite crazy here with everything goin' on...

IM GOING TO ISRAEL TOMORROW!!! Im so excited but i have a million and one things to do, i haven't started packing yet, and i need to run a lot of errands and stuff. but since a lot of places are closed by now anyway, im gonna do stuff around the house that needs to get done too.

so long!! "see" ya in like 10 days!!

Conflicts

2009-01-05T23:38:00.003-05:00

you know how in literature class in high school we always discussed a character's internal and external conflicts?

well, i'm dealing with those right now...

Should i go to Israel with everything that's going on now? should i push off my trip? cancel? go and be restricted to few areas of Yerushalayim?

plus i have 3 finals and one report due tomorrow and i haven't started the report!!

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh

sorry i just needed to vent a little and exclaim my deep frustrations dealing with all these issues right now

Sundays

2009-01-04T18:05:00.003-05:00

I love busy Sundays!

im the kind of person who loves to be busy so today was a great day, B"H- super busy, tho.

this was my day (so far):

out for brunch with a friend at 12... menachem avel a friend who lost her husband... back home to clean up from shabbos (cuz if i don't do it, it won't get done :)... got dressed for a belated chanukah party at a family friend... off to the party... back home again to get dressed for a vort... off to the vort in a few minutes (waiting for my dad...)...

then i gotta do some work for school and study and figure out my trip to israel- i'm leaving I"YH a week from tomorrow!!!!!

all in all, a busy day- AND it's not even over!! :) even better!

oh- take a look at my poll to the right- i'd love to know what you think.

new great awakening

2009-01-01T20:26:00.006-05:00

i came across this amazing article i can't wait to show my mother because it justifies all those mornings i woke up late!! lol

3 Smart Things About Sleeping Late

1. You may need more sleep than you think.

Research by Henry Ford Hospital Sleep Disorder Center found that people who slept eight hours and claimed they were "well rested" actually performed better and were more alert if they slept another two hours. That figures. Until the invention of the light bulb (darn you, Edison!), the average person slumbered 10 hours a night.

2. Night owls are more creative.

Artists, writers, and coders typically fire on all cylinders by crashing near dawn and awakening at the crack of noon. In one study, "evening people" almost universally slam-dunked a standardized creativity test. Their "early bird" brethren struggled for passing scores.

3. Rising early is stressful.

The stress hormone cortisol peaks in your blood at around 7 am. So if you get up then, you may experience tension. Grab some extra Zs. You'll wake up feeling less like Bert, more like Ernie.

OK, for all those who actually read the article, despite all the "scientific" stuff in there, i hope you enjoyed it! I thought it was really interesting, especially since i'm more of a late-night person if you haven't noticed by the times of my posts and comments lol. just a few comments...:

1. i once heard from someone that it's best to study right before you go to sleep because it stays better in your brain. i don't know if that has been scientifically proven, but i've heard it from a bunch of people (not that that means its true :)

2. when did "Zs" come to mean "sleep"... like in comic books, to show someone's sleeping...

What's in a name?

2008-12-31T22:01:00.005-05:00

i've been asked a bunch of times what my username means and where it originates from. so i feel compelled to enlighten those who want to know. here goes...

a while back i was bored in computer class and started playing games like "Out Of Order" and other fun stuff on a website called BoxerJam. eventually i made a username and somehow came up with "tembow." there's like this chat thing on the site that you can talk to the people you're playing the game with (not that i really did; it's pretty dangerous, if you know what i mean). and someone said that "tembow" means "elephant" in Swahili. (check this out: Swahili- tembow) so, i guess you learn something new every day, right?

the username just stuck and when i started commenting on blogs i used it and eventually made a blog. the end.

hope i didn't disappoint anybody. it's really not that exciting! LOL

but you guys can come up with some other more interesting meanings for "tembow" if you'd like. have fun!

ps. foreign languages are cool. anybody know any unusual ones?

my grandfather had a knack for languages. he spoke EIGHT! languages! i always forget which ones tho :)

freaky story

2008-12-30T16:49:00.002-05:00

all things happen to you for a reason but sometimes it's a little bit harder to find the reason than other times.

take what happened to me yesterday.

i was waiting in line for my bus at the bus terminal yesterday, listening to my ipod when i see a man walking towards the outside door, from where all the buses are, not really where people usually come from. i didn't think anything of it until he comes close to the door coming into the terminal. i see his hands are covered in blood and he's got a gash on his face, still bleeding. he was an older white man, probably about 60. mind you, there are about 25 people waiting in line and everyone's just in shock. they don't know what to do. the man has a hard time getting the door opened and someone finally opens it for him. he keeps walking past the line of people (everyone's just staring at him) until one guy asks, "are you alright, sir?" the man responds "yes" and continues walking. now i'm listening to my ipod and can't really hear that much (and i don't really want to usually) but a few minutes later i heard a yell and the lady standing next to me screams! apparently the man fell down the steps. the guy who had asked him if he was okay runs down to help him. a few minutes later, the man who had gone to help comes back and says that someone called 911 and there are people down there helping him.

i was so freaked out. the entire bus ride i couldn't get it out of my head. obviously there was something wrong with the guy or someone had really hurt him badly.

there must be a reason why i had to see such a thing. but its so freaky. and then i came home and heard what had happened to my friend's brother-in-law and all in all, it was just a crazy day.

2008-12-29T21:11:00.004-05:00

There's a time for simcha and there's a time for sadness.

But what happens when the two are required on the very same night?

while getting ready to go to the wedding of a friend, i got the news that my friend's brother-in-law was tragically killed in a car accident. i was shocked. still am shocked. how is such a thing possible? the sweetest guy ever, always smiling, such a nice person with such fine middos. now gone. and it's so hard to think about his wife, whom i know, who must be falling apart on the news of this horrible tragedy.

then i had to go to the wedding. how can i go to a wedding and be happy when i know some people are in so much pain?? let me tell you- it was so hard. it took a while just to get into the simcha at the wedding because how can you go from one thing to the other?? it's almost inhuman.

what i hate most about all this is the helplessness. what can i do? i can be there for my friend but how can i really know and understand what she's going thru??

Zos Chanukah

2008-12-29T00:53:00.002-05:00

I know that tonite/tomorrow is called "Zos Chanukah" (this is Chanukah). Why? And what does that mean practically for us? Should i be focusing on something special during the day?

I heard once that Zos Chanukah is such an important day that Moshiach could come.

My question is why??

Diets

2008-12-28T01:50:00.003-05:00

my father has a sign that he hung up next to his computer so that he sees it all the time as a motivation for his diet. this is what it says:

Nothing tastes as good as thin feels.

i love it! it's so true. after i eat something, even something that tastes really good, i'm always like: i should NOT have eaten that... it's so fattening... so not worth it... in a day i'll forget about it and that's so true! i really regret eating things after i've eaten them. i don't know if that's so good but i do.

i really pigged out this shabbos. it was disgusting. but its so hard to control myself. i always think, im going to exercise ANYWAY- i'll just burn off these calories. but that's such a bad attitude.

when im following a diet, i can follow it completely, to the "T'', but when im just watching what i eat... it's so hard to really watch it. i end with the attitude that if i eat one thing i may as well eat 19 because i've already gone overboard and pigged out.

i guess i should add to the blog description that this blog will also be about dieting, or rather- talking about dieting... not that i'll actually do it! lol :)

continued...

2008-12-25T20:49:00.002-05:00

part 2 of the meme:

1. my absolute favorite food is coffee ice cream.

2. i always wished i knew how to figure skate.

figure skaters always look so graceful and i've always admired them but i'm too scared to learn how to ice skate. i've fallen too many times and hurt too many parts of my body :) so i can always wish and imagine what it's like.. maybe... someday... :)

3. someone once told me i look like chelsea clinton.

i don't know if i should take that as a compliment or an insult. there are some ugly pictures of her out there from when she was young. but it's pretty rough growing up under the scrutiny of the media. i wouldn't really want to be "first kid."

4. i love whipped cream!

put it on fruit, hot cocoa, coffee... you name it! or even just plain- squirt it straight into my mouth!! actually a few minutes ago my sis and i were doing that to each other. my mother walked into the kitchen just as i was squirting some into my sister's mouth. she wasn't too happy! thankfully she didn't mention the part it being "very fattening." i don't need any reminding.

5. if i could be any creature, i would be a fish or a dolphin.

i love the water! im big into swimming!

6. the most expensive thing i have ever bought for myself is my macbook.

i love it! im a big mac-fan

7. i like going shopping by myself.

it's so much more relaxing. i usually get a lot more stuff.

pretty random, no?

im not gonna tag anyone. if you want to do this too, pretend i tagged you :)p

you can link up to here.

i've been tagged!!

2008-12-25T19:53:00.018-05:00

okay so i've been tagged by The Babysitter and it would be really mean not to respond plus i also think it's kinda cool and interesting... you guys get to learn some RANDOM stuff so why not? (check out The Babysitter's explanation of the meme)

book meme:

They veered off toward the philosophical and debated the
necessary properties of bashert. They knew that they were
all looking for their destined match. But were they required
to believe that there was only one person out there for each
of them? The romantic and the fervent among them insisted
that they were. God matched boys to girls before they were
born. The more practical girls challenged this notion. What
about people who died before they got married? Did that mean
they never had a bashert, because of course God knew that they
would die young? Or did it mean that somewhere out there, the
second half of this couple was hopefully searching for a bashert
who was dead?
this excerpt is from p. 56 of The Outside World by Tova Mirvis.
I really liked the book and I have read it more than once. It's
funny actually that these few lines have to do with something
i've previously written about- like bashert and height, etc. a total
"accident" (nothing is really an accident; everything is planned
by Him). Hope you found it interesting!

next meme coming soon!

Miracles & Appreciation

2008-12-24T20:29:00.003-05:00

chanukah is a time of miracles. it's also a time of appreciation. we thank Hashem for the miracles He performed at that time and for all He does until today.

i just heard of a family who i know of whose house burnt down! tonite- after candle lighting they left and came back to find their house completely gone. kids are traumatized. everyone's in shock.

my neighbor went to sloan-kettering memorial hospital today to visit a 23 year old who's sick. he is a baal teshuva who learned for a year in yeshiva, got married and then three months later was diagnosed and it's been downhill from then on. he can't even talk anymore it's so bad.

you can't take anything for granted anymore. life is precious. everyday things are miracles. it's a miracle i'm alive and well and healthy B"H and my family as well. B"H we have what we need, we have a house (unlike this family that is now HOMELESS). these things happen and put everything in perspective. it's like now i realize that little things shouldn't bother me cuz they're so NOT important. they're just "little things."

im so grateful i got to work ok today and didn't slip on the icy sidewalks.

im grateful i have a job.

im grateful for my family.

for my friends. for my neighbors.

im grateful that i afford to buy what i want. grateful i can go to israel.

im grateful i can get wake-up calls like these (though unfortunate they are) to realize how lucky i am to have what i have and be who i am.

ps. his tehillim name is reuven ben sara. please daven!

*UPDATE*

Baruch Dayan HaEmes- reuven ben sara was niftar this morning. May he be a mailitz yosher for all of us.

1000 and still counting...

2008-12-23T17:24:00.004-05:00

guys- i can't believe i've hit 1000 hits in just 20 days! that's crazy! thanks for all the links and stuff. its so cool!

for a dvar torah about 1000, see israel chronicles's post: "1,000 hits and a bit of Torah"

(i've taken the easy way out :)

what's the weather like up there?

2008-12-22T23:55:00.003-05:00

is it wrong to want a boy who is taller than me? besides for the whole "shallow" "superficial" aspect of it, some say it makes you "look up to him" in more ways than one :)

am i being unrealistic? with the whole bashert thing (which i DO believe in): let's say my bashert is shorter than me and maybe i don't go out with him because of height issues?

Can't go into the details but...

2008-12-22T22:09:00.002-05:00

You can't believe everything you hear.

Our parents have told us that millions of times. But do we really listen? We should.

My friend almost had a shidduch pulled out from under her feet because of some sick rumors about the boy. I can't go into any details but because of some person who decided that somehow the situation justified exaggeration or making up some "facts", she almost did not go out with this guy again even tho she really liked him.

you have to be so careful with things you say, especially when it comes to shidduchim. but in all areas as well. with shidduchim, people can say nasty things just because they don't like your parents, the school you went to, or because they're just plain jealous. make sure to get sources for everything you hear and don't believe something until it has been absolutely proven! it's not fair to either side. it wasn't fair to my friend. it wasn't fair to the boy.

we're dealing with people's lives here.

i remember a few years ago, d'rav meir put on a play that was publicized by CCHF because it was about a girl who said lashon hara about another girl and it RUINED HER LIFE. i don't remember the story but it was really powerful.

1st nite of Chanukah!

2008-12-21T23:33:00.011-05:00

Here's an excerpt from an article on aish.com by sara yocheved rigler, called "The Chanukah Question" i thought is interesting:

Chanukah is the holiday of standing up boldly for your beliefs, of not yielding an inch.
Chanukah commemorates the historical victory of the Maccabees over the Greeks. The Jewish rebellion started in the year 167 B.C.E., after a century of Greek cultural hegemony and increasing assimilation. In the village of Modiin, Greek forces commanded the Jews to make offerings to a pagan god. One submissive Jew complied. This so inflamed the elderly priest Mattathias that he sprang up, killed the servile Jew, and led his five sons and handful of followers into the hills for a protracted guerrilla war against the Greeks and their Hellenistic Jewish cohorts.
The message of Chanukah is: Hold onto your religious convictions, never submit to the assimilated majority, no matter how numerous or sophisticated they are, and fight for your ideals.
So which is the Jewish value: to yield or to resist?
The salient difference between the lights of Shabbat and the lights of Chanukah are their location. Shabbat candles are always lit inside the home. Chanukah candles should ideally be lit outside, by the entrance to the house. (This is how we still do it in Jerusalem.) Only when the Jews were exiled to the Diaspora did safety dictate moving the Chanukah lights inside, but even there they are to be kindled in a window where they can be seen from outside. The mitzvah of lighting the Chanukah candles is to publicize the miracle of the oil.
While the Shabbat candles illumine the private domain of the home, the Chanukah candles are a statement to the public domain.
Similarly, the place for yielding is in the home, within the family. The place for standing up for one's convictions is the public realm.
Unfortunately, we often reverse the two: A Jewish college student who is afraid to stand up to his politically correct friends and defend Israel refuses to yield to his mother's entreaties to wear a tie to his grandparents' anniversary party. A Jewish woman who sits mutely during coffee break while her co-workers joke about "cheap Jews," finds her tongue and waxes eloquent in her self-defense when her husband asks her to put the kids to bed on time.
The place to stand up for your beliefs is the public realm. In the home, yield, yield, yield.
If you are chronically tardy, and your spouse likes to arrive everywhere 15 minutes early, yield.
Ask yourself, "What is his/her reality?" and validate it. If you are a spendthrift and your spouse is frugal, yield. Ask yourself, "What is his/her reality?" and validate it. If your idea of a vacation is a five-star hotel, and your children want to vacation in the national parks, ask yourself, "What is their reality?" and validate it. Then decide what is best for the whole family.
But in the public realm, when Judaism, Jews, or Israel are under attack, stand up and fight! That's the lesson of Chanukah.

Just something to think about on the first night of chanukah.

any thoughts?

finished, finit, gamarnu

2008-12-20T22:59:00.003-05:00

I did it! Finished one out of two papers for school! Not exactly the way i like to spend motzai shabbos but you know, you gotta do what you gotta do. it's so hard to actually sit down and write but it wasn't so bad. i actually learned something new.

Shabbos was nice and realllllly quiet. i went to sleep at 7:30 PM and woke up at 10:40 AM!!! haven't slept that much in a while. prob won't get that much sleep this week cuz there's so much work to be done cuz we're finishing up the semester and then comes finals and then the well-deserved vacation which im really looking forward to. though im the type of person who, when im bored, wishes i had a lot to do, so im not complaining about being busy. i love it!

and hopefully because i'm gonna be so busy this week, i won't be eating a lot because, seriously i feel like i gained like ten pounds over the last week. but o yeah- i just realized it's gonna be chanukah so there goes my losing weight. lol. latkes, donuts and chocolate coins are not really conducive to dieting so i guess that'll have to be for next week! :D

So excited for Chanukah! It's one of my favorite yomim tovim cuz its just like real family time. all together lighting candles and singing. though i'm gonna miss my sis in sem- it'll be so weird without her but i've kinda gotten used to not having her around for the yomim tovim already (shhh... don't tell her...)

we're planning on going to philly next weekend (sunday/monday) just for a change of scenary but i might not be able to go :( cuz i gotta work on monday. we'll see....

newayz, don't know how im gonna sleep tonite because of all my sleep last night. so wish me luck. and, o yeah- gotta wake up early tomorrow morning! yay! NOT

YU CONCERT!!!!!

2008-12-18T23:34:00.002-05:00

Im so curious.. did anybody go to the YU concert tonite? i couldn't make it but it sounded like it was gonna be ONE AWESOME CONCERT!! i absolutely love kuntsler and menucha and gabay (mostly) plus YBC (usually) and put together they = an amazing show.

so can anyone tell me how was???

Dating in Israel

2008-12-17T22:41:00.002-05:00

my friend suggested that my mom look into boys learning in israel so that when im in israel in january i can go out there. im a little hesitant about that. there are pros and cons:

it might be nice to have a different type of atmosphere, different places to go, to see things together, etc. but then again, its israel, and my parents won't be able to meet him and let's say it does go past one, two, three dates, and then its time for me to go home. what happens then? he comes to America? I dont know. Its such a new concept to me- I don't know if i'd be more nervous to date from someone else's house or less nervous....

we'll have to see if anything is even shayach or if anyone says "yes" before i get there.

Favorite Song?

2008-12-16T21:56:00.004-05:00

As a real music fan, it would be so interesting to know everyone's favorite song...

so pick your favorite song at this moment and post it (including artist and album name if you can)!

FYI: my FSN (SomethingDifferent-that's for you: my abbreviation which stands for... can you guess?) is Birchos Avicha by Dovid Gabay on his second album, Omar Dovid. for those not familiar with it, its a stunning song!!!! here's a link for it on mostlymusic just for a taste...

Naive?

2008-12-16T14:29:00.003-05:00

K- so in school today was talking to two girls who are younger than me and one was just redt her first shidduch and she was nervous about how the first phone call works and what to talk about and what happens on first date, etc etc. I tried to give her some advice but you know, up until i went on my first date about 4 months ago, i had no clue what to do or what to say or what to expect. so its not like im the best person to give her advice because i don't have that much experience. but it was interesting to see what I was like before i went out on my first date. probably so naive just like these girls, who've never gone out before. it was just interesting to see myself from a different perspective, just like frum college girl observed what she was like in HS in her post yesterday.

it would be so cool to have an out-of-body experience and observe myself from the outside. that's probably sorta what it's like to have an identical twin, no?

The Media

2008-12-15T21:58:00.003-05:00

I am absolutely disgusted with media in the United States. Particularly SNL (Saturday Night Live). No, i don't have tv or watch tv but i saw an article about a recent episode they had about Governor Paterson of NY. For those of you who don't know, he's legally blind and he took over office when Gov. Spitzer left. This tv show mocked him and portrayed him as incapable of acting as governor due to his disability. I find this so revolting that people could make fun of someone just because of a disablity, whether it be blindness, deafness, paralysis, etc. It is so unbelievable that people are on a level to do such a thing! Just because Sarah Palin is out of the media's eye right now doesn't mean that gives anyone the right to pick on any other person for lack of a story for a tv show! It's just a proof that people are cruel!

Gov. Paterson's reaction to this was:

"This particular Saturday Night Live skit unfortunately chose to ridicule people with physical disabilities and imply that disabled people are incapable of having jobs with serious responsibilities."

What a world! It's SICK.

I'm sorry- I just couldn't not comment. Though i'm totally not a politics person at all, this just has to do with humanity (or lack of it.)

Israel!!

2008-12-15T20:54:00.003-05:00

Israel, here I come!! I am super excited because i just booked my ticket for winter vacation!

OMG i can't wait!! my sister is in sem and i can't wait to see her and just have an awesome vacation!

Any bloggers going?

my paper

2008-12-14T14:52:00.001-05:00

my paper for school that was non-existant five hours ago, is now in existance. just not finished quite yet. but still an accomplishment nonetheless.

2008-12-14T00:33:00.002-05:00

just a funny quote i heard from my friend's husband today:

"when your kids were little you could eat them up and when they got older you wished you had"

The Mall.

2008-12-13T22:41:00.003-05:00

Just a few random thoughts spurred on by my trip to the mall tonite...

1. Everybody know about me that im a big music person. i love to listen to music, sing and all that stuff. i can listen to a song once and almost know it and keep singing it for days. this is all good until the holiday season comes around. stores are full of the holiday music playing 24/7! i'll be in a store shopping and walk out with "jingle bells" or "its xmas time in the city" playing and replaying itself in mind head. not that i actually want to be singing these songs- to the contrary! but they get stuck in my head. argggggg...

2. in bloomingdales i hear this woman calling to her son whom she named...... messiah! how crazy is that? i was tempted to ask her why? does she actually think her son is The Messiah??

last week a girl in my class was reading the newspaper and there was an article about celebrities' baby names and how some are really crazy. here are just a few for your entertainment:

Audio Science

Brooklyn

Camera

Heavenly Hiraani Tiger Lily

Hopper

Ireland

Jazz Domino

Liberty

Luna Coco Patricia

Moon Unit

Ocean

Pilot Inspektor

Sage Moonblood

Seven Sirium

Satchel

Honestly, why would you name your kid something that would cause him/her to be made fun for the rest of his/her life??? i don't get it at all. i think these people just see the kid as an "it" like who cares what we name "it." its pathetic. really. crazy. this world as gone crazy.

homework

2008-12-13T19:48:00.002-05:00

for some reason i have this crazy thing about school work: either i do it wayyyyy in advance or i cram. now why should that make any sense?? :)p

i have two reports due in the next two weeks and i haven't started either one plus ive got some projects to do for some classes and a bunch of other non-school work that's been on my "to do" list since after sukkos! really not fun! i can't get myself to sit down and do it; it's so hard...

im really not a procrastinator by nature but there are some things i just can't get myself to do. im one of those people who can get things done- and get them done FAST. but i guess i could write the paper all in one night so why bother doing it in advance?

so i think i'll go to the mall tonite.... lol

shallow?

2008-12-12T15:01:00.003-05:00

shal⋅low

(adjective)

1. of little depth; not deep: shallow water.

2. lacking depth; superficial: a mind that is not narrow but shallow.

of course there are other definitons but these pertain to the discussion...

now who defines a person as being shallow?

inspiration

2008-12-12T08:54:00.003-05:00

my sister wrote this poem called "Holding On" a few years back:

I'm inspired.

The speaker spoke

Of her journey to

Becoming frum.

She changed her life:

Maybe I can too in my

Own small ways.

"Her clothes were so ugly,"

They're saying.

"She kept moving her

Hands as she spoke.

I was inspired.

Doubts creep into my mind

And cloud my thoughts of

Growth and self-improvement.

They trample the speech with

Their words.

They trample my inspiration.

I try to push away their words

And my doubts.

But it's hard to hold on to

Inspiration.

It happens to me all the time. I get inspired and it doesn't last.

When i was in high school, we read an article in class about inspiration and how to make it last. You have to make something concrete to remind you of it so you can hold onto it forever.

But its so hard.

There's this woman i know who's suffering from breast cancer (a mother of two little girls) and they've been thru so much, even before this happened. She just had surgery last week. I was asked to help out a little bit so i volunteered to go friday mornings at 7 am. i came back about an hour ago from there. i came back inspired. life is so short- gotta make the people you love important to you and do the right things. but now, even an hour later, its gone (well, almost). and i don't want to let it go.

No Patience!!!

2008-12-11T20:32:00.003-05:00

I hate it!!! shidduchim take forever.

even if someone told me that they redt me a boy and then they have to hear back from him, it could be months until i actually hear something back - and usually i don't hear anything from them! its really frustrating. like this girl told me that she has a guy for me so i sent her my resume and its been like a month and i haven't hear anything. i hate the stupid lists that guys have- or really, their mothers have... its crazy. honestly, there must be a better way.

everything just takes the longest time. and then i get my hopes up and nothing comes out of it. my mom's friends have this habit of asking us first if we're interested before they even get a yes from the boy's side and then i may not even find out if they're interested or not.

im sure people have ideas of how to better the system. wanna share?

Friends

2008-12-11T20:25:00.002-05:00

I truly feel lucky. I've got two amazing friends who I'm in college with and we're in all the same classes, we sit together at lunch, and drive to school together. It's so great being able to have them there everyday. I wouldn't be able to go thru school without their smiles and laughs and comments. we sit together at lunch and just people-watch, while we silently eat our lunches- its cute; we don't even talk. but i guess we're together so often there's not much to say. Guys- ur the best! So lucky to have you in school with me! but N- we'll miss you next semester, traitor!!! :)

My epiphany... listen up!

2008-12-08T18:52:00.002-05:00

I had an epiphany last week that i think is amazing! Here goes...

If you wake up in the morning and you decide "Today is gonna be a great day," then it will!

It's true. I decided to do that like a week ago, one morning, and I had the best day ever. (happens to be it was my birthday- so who knows, maybe it was cause of that but seriously...)

I gotta try it again tomorrow. this morning was horrible but then got better. i need tom to be a great day. so how about giving it a try? its worth it :)

Too Short!

2008-12-06T19:02:00.003-05:00

Shabbos was great but soooo short! a friend came over with her husband and baby for seuda shlishit. it was so nice. but then before you know it- shabbos is over. and motzai shabbos is so long and there's like hardly anything to do in this town of mine. nothing happening...

what do you usually do on motzai shabbos? besides for occasional vorts or shopping sprees :) there's nothing to do! :( its kinda depressing...

First Post

2008-12-03T19:43:00.000-05:00

Wow! this is fun. starting a blog. i've been wanting to for a while.

so just for some background info: im a 20 year old girl in college and "in the parsha." basically that's what this blog will revolve around and hopefully be interesting. ive only gone out with three guys so far. last nite was guy #3. he was a nice guy but i was not really attracted at all and i didn't think it would be worth it to go out again because i didn't see it going anywhere. so this morning when the shadchan called my mother said "no."

now my question is: last night, as soon as i saw him, i knew that i didn't want to go out again. so of course we still had a good time on the date and i talked to him and everything but i hope i didn't lead him on to think i was having a good time and wanted to go out again when i really didn't! that wouldn't be fair to him and we would both have had a horrible time if i didn't talk and try to make it comfortable. so was that the right thing to do? plus- i feel bad because the shadchan called this afternoon asking me to reconsider and go out with him again because he really wanted to go out again. i'm flattered but i know it's not gonna go anywhere. i'm not attracted. am i being fair? realistic? of course i want a good looking husband! (not that this guy was overly ugly; just not my taste)

i feel bad. i don't know why. i know i made the right decision for myself. but he's really disappointed. how do i reconcile this?

what do you think about attraction on a first or second date? does it come with time or should that be something to consider on the first date??