I left the shiur with a mission: to forgive someone I've held a grudge against for nearly four years. Even though I thought I had forgiven her for what she did and how she acted towards me, I did not forget. And in Yiddishkeit, it's not ok to just forgive but one needs to forget also. Because if you still remember, then it means you still hold a grudge. So I decided to honestly and completely and wholeheartedly forgive and forget the incident. Because I can truly see how though this person may have wronged me, she actually did me the biggest favor because I ended up where I did and it was all yad Hashem- truly. (though i did not realize that at the time, of course)
I feel like a burden is now lifted off my heart.
And I know that when I see her next week (and I know I will for sure), that I can go over to her and hug her and honestly ask how she's doing, and forget the past, because the future is so much more important.
When i think of her now, all i can do is smile. It's a funny thing, mechila (forgiveness). Totally changes everything upside and right side up.