or are they?
who made up all these rules about shidduchim? things like, waiting upstairs when the guy comes in to meet your parents, him opening the car door for you, who leaves the house first... all these things. who made them up? must have been someone. these things have become so accepted that if someone breaks the rules, it's like they've done something wrong, when in reality they haven't... they've just done something different.
and these days people are so against people being different.
but what i think is interesting is that i've gotten questions from shadchanim or people who have called me about my friends for a shidduch, like: what makes you different from all the other girls out there? what makes so-and-so different?
so what's going on here? is different good or bad?
10 comments:
i always break the rules :-)
but you're from OOT lol
yea... we're so much more awesomer here (no offense ;-P)
Just a quick note about who walks in front of who...
It's actually not just a rule that someone decided to make up for fun - it's a halacha that a woman is not allowed to walk right in front of a man. I heard about this halacha b4 I started daing and it's a good thing I did! cuz then I knew to be careful with it...
You can double check this one with your Rabbi - it's a real one!
But yeah, you are right about being different and it's always good & fun to do something wacky once in a while...you gotta think out of the box and do things that are different! I think different is good, as long as it's not dangerous!!
Tembow- why do you follow these rules if you think they are silly (besides for the one Itsagift mentioned)? Don't follow them. Open the door for the guy yourself, and leave, before your parents interview him. No one will know except you and your date.
Yeah, different is good. Take it from an expert. ;)
i have done things differently on dates. who cares?! some i've got to just deal with tho and let them go...
What rules? I do whatever feels natural...for better or for worse.
yikes I didn't realize there was a rule to who leaves the house first! whose supposed to leave first?
very interesting point. Lately I hear a lot about "being different", but I think they mean "unique", not different as in rebel.
Itsagift: oops, I think I've walked in front. But I can see what you mean. Actually now that I think about it, I think I always try to not be in front when walking up or down stairs, but its hard in college when there's so many people.
You got 2 options, follow the rules or marry somebody normal.
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